Dismantle. Repair.

“Love is the feeling we have for those we care deeply about and hold in high regard. It can be light as the hug we give a friend or heavy as the sacrifices we make for our children. It can be romantic, platonic, familial, fleeting, everlasting, conditional, unconditional, imbued with sorrow, stoked by sex, sullied by abuse, amplified by kindness  twisted by betrayal, deepened by time, darkened by difficulty, learned by generosity, nourished by humor and ‘loaded with promises and commitments’ that we may or may not want to keep. The best thing you can possibly do with your life is tackle the motherfucking shit out of love. ” - Tiny Beautiful Things

Well life is about love, lost minutes and lost evening
About fire in our bellies and about furtive little feelings
And the aching amplitudes that set our needles all a-flickering
And they help us with remembering that the only thing that’s left to do is live

I turn up the music, roll out of bed with a smile on my face. Finally, it’s been so long. Things are changing. Change is really the only constant in this world. As much as nostalgia can be a painful thing, I try to pull out the good things. Nostalgia is something I hold onto and grip to with a smile. Blasting Semi Charmed life I just remember all those spring and summer days, driving in your car, windows down screaming it at the top of our lungs. The sun right in our faces and the smile I was wearing felt so permanent. My iPod rolls into I’m Not Your Boyfriend. And I remember squeezing into the tiny e30 with 4 of you boys speeding through Holy Hill in the dark. We were all squeezed in so tight trying to smoke our cigarettes and laughing at everything and not really caring that we were way beyond the speed limit on those tight winding roads. EVERYBODY MUST GET STONED. I picture all you boys linked together with your arms on each others shoulders with Jeremy singing by the kitchen. I just sat at the bar watching and laughing. I have an endless supply of these memories all attached to specific songs. As sad is it may be at so many of us spread out and don’t keep in contact, I can’t help but smile and say thank you. Thank you for everything you all did for me. You guys will forever and always be apart of me, you will be the part that smiles when I pass that small building on Main Street, or when one of those songs comes up on the radio, or whenever an e36 M3 or any type of E30 rolls on by. Thank you. Thank you for infecting my life and burying your self so deep inside me I will never forget you if I tried. I truly love you all.